When I first started thinking about the potential possibility of starting a blog, I thought to myself what on earth do I have to write about? Who in the world would care to read MY blog? I still think this, but as I continued to revisit the idea it became clear to me that this was something I wanted to do and should do FOR ME, it was a project that would make me happy, and IT HAS! Every time I complete a post I feel a small sense of accomplishment, gratification and pride. Every time I figure out a small detail on how to put the blog together, whether it’s changing a font, formatting a page or uploading a picture just the way I want it, I feel sooooooo excited and it’s fulfilling… even if it took me half the day or an entire day to do it. Every step forward, no matter how many steps I feel I may have taken backwards feels great! I’m learning something new every single time; I’m learning about blog development, using social media, editing pictures, about myself and my style…whenever I invest valuable time into this project, I walk away with just a little bit more knowledge and this to me is invaluable.
One of the main things that attracted me to blogging was writing, I really enjoy writing. As a kid/young teenager I journaled quite a bit, I kept a lot of those journals for some time, but between a few moves, closet clean outs and impulsive moments of “what do I need this crap for” most of those journals are gone. I regret not keeping them! It would have been nice to remember what I was like at that age, how I thought, the things I felt mattered, who was important in my life besides my family of course. I’ve forgotten a lot of those details about myself, even though I think I know what kind of kid I was, I’m fairly certain my memory of me isn’t entirely who I was, I think I’ve been selective in what I’ve chosen to remember. However, I do remember the feeling I got when I wrote in my journals or diaries…. I’m not sure what I called them at the time. I remember feeling comforted, relieved, peaceful, happy. As an adult I revisited journaling here and there but never really committed to it until now that I started my blog. It’s been very therapeutic for me, it’s my haven. I didn’t realize I had been neglecting myself and my soul this much. I’m beginning to allow myself the opportunity to streamline my visions, and understand or at least try to understand my feelings and emotions. I’m also taking time to create a plan and take action to improve those areas of my life I haven’t been paying much attention to.
An unexpected benefit of blogging is the opportunity to track and narrow in on short term and long-term goals; I’ve found that I hold myself more accountable on committing to my goals and I procrastinate just a little less. I track my achievements and push myself to work on areas I’ve neglected. It’s not novelty that physically writing things down has many benefits. It helps you stay focused, it helps you think bigger and better, you get distracted less, you remember more, it helps you commit, you have tangible records, and I’m sure much more! When I’m preparing for a new post, I personally like to physically write things down, there’s something very personal about this for me. Once I have a good outline, I start typing and doing my editing. But just the simple act of writing it down and seeing the list of things I want to write about or things I want to do, motivates me to follow through; a quality I can shamefully say I haven’t been to keen at for the past 10 or so years.
As you’ll notice, family, particularly my children, Elias and Tommy are one of the main pieces of my life I love to write about. Much of what I do in life right now revolves around them, I really do want to be a great Mom and give them a happy and healthy life. I want them to grow up to be strong, smart, kind-hearted, understanding, successful men who are respectful of themselves and others…I often question if I’m doing this correctly, but I can honestly say I’m trying very hard to do lead them in that direction. And I want to keep a memoire of what I’m doing to try and make this happen, I want to be able to look back at our daily adventures, special moments, struggles and accomplishments as a family. To me it’s important and heartwarming to see how my boys evolve. I’m hopeful that in the future Elias and Tommy will read this blog and remember all the fun times and adventures we’ve had and are yet to have and who we are/were as a family.
I know my time with Elias and Tommy is limited, God willing, they will eventually grow up and be their own independent men and make their own life and form their own families. I won’t be their entire world forever and it breaks my heart to even think that the law of life is for them to leave me. But I have them here with me now, and I feel so blessed and lucky to be their Mom. Although I’ve always felt blessed about many parts of my life, family, health, career, my clarity and sensation of this has definitely heightened since I began blogging. Even the hardest more emotional days seem much more manageable when I reflect and journal. I somehow feel that ultimately, whatever the hardship, in the end it’ll be okay.
Blogging has become my time to reflect and makes sense of things. I focus on people, hobbies and situations that are happening around my life. Some people turn to exercise, meditation or a sport among other things, and while I hope to one day have the skills to embed some of these kinds of activities in my life, at this point in time, blogging helps me feed my soul. It’s become my new journal that I can continue to look back at as I evolve as a person.
Until Next Time…Much Love!!!